Saturday, March 31, 2012

Stuck In My Head

Once upon a time, I said to someone "I am so, so ill, and I'm tired of sucking it up when you're around, of slapping a smile on my face and pretending to feel well when really, I'm very sick, and all I want is to curl up in a ball."

The response was, simply: "Thank you so much for doing that, I really appreciate it!"

I hate to admit it, but it's stuck in my head. I can't move beyond the selfishness that lies behind that statement. As if it was perfectly fine for me to be someone or something I'm not, as long as it kept someone else happy. This is a good reminder of why, these days, I enjoy spending time alone in my kingdom :).

Though most might describe me as complex, the truth is, I'm not. I simply expect people to behave in ways that build up those around them, not tear them down, and to encourage others to be their authentic selves. I'll never be willing to compromise on these standards. Are the expectations too high? Perhaps for some people, they are, but for me, they are not, and I've learned through the years that there are plenty of people who will disappoint... but the ones that don't are true gems and should be held as closely as possible.

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